Thursday, January 2, 2014
Dreams Come True
My friends got married the other day. The fact that they’re both male is somewhat noteworthy, but with Marriage Equality wending its way across the United States, less so. That the ceremony took place aboard a Rose Bowl Float is what took the world by storm. It’s a little surreal to be watching along with 80 million others when you actually know the people on the screen. (And kudos to so many of the TV stations for not cutting away.) The best way for me to celebrate their marriage and the start of a new calendar year is by introducing you to them.
I met Danny some 16 years ago. He was hired (sight and resume unseen) by the owner of a client to take over my duties as I transitioned out of my role as day-to-day person and took on the role of a more traditional consultant. Danny was younger than me, cuter and had a boyfriend. Try as I might to dislike him for such things, I couldn't. We immediately bonded. He was eager to learn, had the smarts to pick up on things and the drive to succeed. He also laughed at my jokes, always a good thing in a budding friendship.
As my consulting business grew and expanded, I found myself in need of smart, energetic people. Soon Danny agreed to work with me and for many years we worked together in a variety of entrepreneurial pursuits. In addition to client work, we created a film company together and produced documentaries, plays and television programs that fulfilled a mission, if not the bottom line. We invested in a property together – becoming land barons together.
We not only had business things in common, but passion for movies, theatre and making a difference in the world. Somehow the distinct lines of work colleagues and friends dissipated. When his relationship dissolved I remember holding him as he wept and worked through the pain. It was the right thing for him to be away from that boyfriend, but the tumult that it caused upset me as well. Who dare hurt my friend? It took a long time for him to recover, and our friendship remained strong. What he needed was somebody who could love him the way he loved.
Sunday, April 14, 2002: Danny showed up different. We had been through ‘transformational’ work together – and knew each other as well as two people do. This day his whole being was different. “I met somebody. His name is Aubrey and he’s the one.”
Truth be told – it took me a while to see that Aubrey was in fact the one. Nothing made me happier than seeing Danny glow…but I was protecting him (and probably myself)…so it took some time before I too fell for Aubrey. Handsome, smart and truly one of the most caring individuals on the planet, it was hard not to see how perfect they are together.
Soon their lives became totally interspersed. They own businesses together, property and are community leaders in the nonprofit arena. A piece of paper isn’t needed to validate their relationship.
In 1989 the Rose Bowl Parade held its first wedding. On the 25th anniversary of that wonderfully affirming event, the first same sex weddings were held on a Rose Bowl float. The theme of the parade was “Dreams Come True” – and certainly it’s a dream come true to have my friends Danny and Aubrey in my life, and now to have them officially married. Congratulations!